a moms heart

No matter how far a pregnancy is or how old a child is a mother will always grieve the loss of the dreams she had for her baby.

To my unborn child,

Although I was never able to feel you move, I knew you were there. I was excited that you were due three days before your sister’s birthday and that you two would be close in age. In my mind, I had already planned trips to Disney world for joint birthday parties. You were always planned, even if not by your father and I. Now I have to believe, you are in the presence of the Lord. Because his word tells me that he knitted you together in my womb, and that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. Jesus was the first thing you ever saw, how blessed you are my baby.

Mommy got a tattoo (something your grandparents were not happy about) to remind me that you are in good hands. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. His faith is not contingent upon our faith, he is always faithful. He always loves. He is the giver of life. To him be the glory. Right now, it is the end of March and we would have just found out if you were a little boy or girl. I will always wonder until I get to heaven and get to see you. I overheard a woman in my mom’s group the other day say she was due at the end of August and I immediately thought of you. You have made me realize what a joy it is to be pregnant and I promise to not complain the next time around. You also taught me to appreciate every day because nothing is guaranteed. Most importantly, I learned to not be afraid of the unknown because the Lord is still on the throne. Thank you. Your short life on earth was a blessing and I am thankful for you. I will never forget you. When August 24th comes, I will remember you. I have wondered if there was anything I could have done differently so that I could have met you, but I know the Lord is bigger than me. I will grieve the loss of you, but heaven rejoices. I will see you one day my sweet baby.

Love,

You’re Mom